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So let me get this straight, with much apology to those who will inevitably find fault in the following discourse.
I am being asked to believe that the two English-speaking super-powers have uncovered a plot to blow up airline flights between the UK and US, thus raising our airline terror alert level to red. Did you even know that there was a separate alert level just for airline flights? Because of this conspiracy, we can't take liquids on flights? Never mind having to dump your terminal-supplied faux-Starbucks mocha latte in the wastebin, how about being forced to drink *gasp* airline coffee? Because of these madmen the UK police won't allow you to take electronic keyfobs on flights? Do you know how many bloody electronic keyfobs there are in our modern automobile world? Replacing the e-fob for a BMW 5-series is probably about $250, even blatantly ignoring the fact you're giving away the keys to your fricking car. You going to drop that in the warm hands of a TSA employee for safe-keeping? Or worse, just let them toss it in the circular file?
And if you've been asleep till noon today and haven't heard the news and immediately tuned in to LJ first thing after waking up...well...get a life. Let's just say you did, the gist is that bad men want to take strange and exotic liquids (or hairgels apparently), plus some triggering devices, in the form of car remotes, laptops, and Tickle-My-Ass Elmo's, to make really big bangs in the blue skies over the Atlantic.
I'm skeptical, to say the least.
But say I'm stuck to Fox News or CNN and I'm buying into this, alarmed at the possibility we've found yet another front in the war against terrorism. Hey, you know what? My attention to the other little things in our small world have suddenly diminished! No war between Israel and Hezbollah, no Iraqi insurgence and possible civil war, no Iranian nuclear programs, no Taliban attacks in Afghanistan and, last but not least, no more worries about that most horrible of earthly places, those pathetic hicks in the Gulf Coast hurricane destruction zone.
Go, go, Georgie! Go, go, Tony-boy! Fight the good fight, men! Keep up the vigilance!
Flame me forthwith, if you must. I find this to be an amazing coincidence, considering the timing of war opposition, an election year, Congress being out of session, and the President's approval rating resting somewhere between stale BBQ pork rinds and David Hasselhoff's chest hair . And so many quotes from Chertoff! Any report I read that has substance supplied by Michael Chertoff has long been considered crapola in my mind.
If this turns out to be a wonderful effort of defense intelligence, I'll summarily withdraw my negative opinion of this event and applaud the powers that be. Until such time, I'm re-entering my denial zone in the Independent State of New Orleans.
You may now move about the cabin freely. But without hair gel.
I am being asked to believe that the two English-speaking super-powers have uncovered a plot to blow up airline flights between the UK and US, thus raising our airline terror alert level to red. Did you even know that there was a separate alert level just for airline flights? Because of this conspiracy, we can't take liquids on flights? Never mind having to dump your terminal-supplied faux-Starbucks mocha latte in the wastebin, how about being forced to drink *gasp* airline coffee? Because of these madmen the UK police won't allow you to take electronic keyfobs on flights? Do you know how many bloody electronic keyfobs there are in our modern automobile world? Replacing the e-fob for a BMW 5-series is probably about $250, even blatantly ignoring the fact you're giving away the keys to your fricking car. You going to drop that in the warm hands of a TSA employee for safe-keeping? Or worse, just let them toss it in the circular file?
And if you've been asleep till noon today and haven't heard the news and immediately tuned in to LJ first thing after waking up...well...get a life. Let's just say you did, the gist is that bad men want to take strange and exotic liquids (or hairgels apparently), plus some triggering devices, in the form of car remotes, laptops, and Tickle-My-Ass Elmo's, to make really big bangs in the blue skies over the Atlantic.
I'm skeptical, to say the least.
But say I'm stuck to Fox News or CNN and I'm buying into this, alarmed at the possibility we've found yet another front in the war against terrorism. Hey, you know what? My attention to the other little things in our small world have suddenly diminished! No war between Israel and Hezbollah, no Iraqi insurgence and possible civil war, no Iranian nuclear programs, no Taliban attacks in Afghanistan and, last but not least, no more worries about that most horrible of earthly places, those pathetic hicks in the Gulf Coast hurricane destruction zone.
Go, go, Georgie! Go, go, Tony-boy! Fight the good fight, men! Keep up the vigilance!
Flame me forthwith, if you must. I find this to be an amazing coincidence, considering the timing of war opposition, an election year, Congress being out of session, and the President's approval rating resting somewhere between stale BBQ pork rinds and David Hasselhoff's chest hair . And so many quotes from Chertoff! Any report I read that has substance supplied by Michael Chertoff has long been considered crapola in my mind.
If this turns out to be a wonderful effort of defense intelligence, I'll summarily withdraw my negative opinion of this event and applaud the powers that be. Until such time, I'm re-entering my denial zone in the Independent State of New Orleans.
You may now move about the cabin freely. But without hair gel.
